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Aziz Ansari, if you could take back one sentence you’ve ever spoken, what would it be? “Sure, I’ll do the Spirit magazine Q-and-A.”
If you could give your 10-year-old self one piece of advice, what would it be?
Work hard; be nice to others.
If you could choose to be born to parents other than your own, who would they be?
Cliff and Clair Huxtable. You didn’t say they had to be real.
If you had to choose a first name other than your own, what would it be and why?
Axel, as in Axel Foley [of 1984’s Beverly Hills Cop]. This is 12-year-old Aziz answering questions now.
If you ruled the world, what’s the first thing you would change?
I wouldn’t want to rule the world. But I do enjoy the Tears for Fears song that counters that notion.
If a picture paints a thousand words, what are you doing in that picture?
Probably wasting time on the Internet.
If you had a superpower, what would it be?
Either knowing what people are thinking or having the ability to know the perfect text to send to girls.
If you had a time machine, where would you go and why?
I’d go right to the date of my death, pop up outside the funeral, and blast T.I.’s “I’m Back.”
If you had coined a single phrase of wisdom, what would it be?
I love what Steve Martin says when people ask for advice on how to make it: “Be undeniably good.”
What About You? If you could listen to only one album for the rest of your life, which would it be and why?
Submit your answer at spiritmag.com/if. Our favorite responses will be published in an upcoming issue of Spirit.
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